


Just Keep Going

by TheseusInTheMaze



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Anal Sex, M/M, Nonbinary Character, making deals, pain play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-25 00:35:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22287091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheseusInTheMaze/pseuds/TheseusInTheMaze
Summary: To know Chaos is to know pain.
Relationships: Zagreus/Chaos
Comments: 5
Kudos: 210
Collections: Chocolate Box - Round 5





	Just Keep Going

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chicago_ruth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chicago_ruth/gifts).



> Hope you enjoy!

Sometimes, Zagreus wondered why he would jump.

He would stand at the edge of the crater, staring down into the strange, ethereal mist that was billowing out of it. Something about it always seemed to pull him forward and shove him away at the same time. Something disgusting and compelling at the same time. He'd never understood it, but then again, he'd never understood a lot of the things that he found in the Underworld. Even growing up in the House of Hades, things hadn't seemed to _make sense_. Maybe that was why he'd always been compelled to leave. 

Or maybe his father was a hateful, controlling prick who had driven his mother away. 

But Zagreus stood at the edge of the hole in the ground, panting and staring down into the mist. If he looked too closely, he thought he could see stars. Or were they eyes? He shook his head, rubbed his eyes, and then he took a deep breath. The mist smelled like cold, and like he imagined the stars would smell like. Before he had a chance to think, his calves were coiling up with energy, and he was jumping down into the hole.

* * *

To know Chaos was to know pain. As he flew through the mist, down into the bowels of creation, the air and the mist and the light yanked his strength out of him. He landed on the strange, barren plane of Chaos's realm, and he staggered. His whole body was still throbbing with the pain of it, but there was an odd pleasure mixed in with it. Something that felt... right, as it burrowed its way into him like a worm through a corpse, and what did that say about him, that he was relishing the sensation? He had dreaded the fall the first few times, after he'd been wracked with spasms and aches, but now he almost looked forward to it. 

Zagreus pulled the bottle of ambrosia from his pocket, and he took a deep breath, licked his lips. He wasn't sure why he kept giving Chaos gifts, when they seemed so confused at the gifts themselves. And yet he kept doing it. 

Something about Chaos was just so _compelling_ \- different from his father, different from the stifling order of his father's house. Zagreus took a deep breath, and he activated the symbol of Chaos, holding the bottle of ambrosia. 

Chaos always seemed to just... appear. The other gods had a flash of lightning, the scent of wine, the sound of screams. Chaos simply... was there, as if they had always been there, and the universe had shifted around them. 

"Why do you continue to give me gifts?" They stared at him with their purple eyes, the great eye in the center of their forehead wide and unblinking. Zagreus was very careful not to look into that one; he had a gut feeling he might end up drowning in it, if he wasn't careful. 

"You've always been good to me," Zagreus said, because he wasn't sure what else to say. "Your... gifts have always helped me, and I wish to return the favor." Not strictly true - more than a few of his deaths had been a result of Chaos's particular boons, but... still. "Anyway, you've always been friendly."

Chaos kept staring at him. It was the kind of creepy scrutiny that people usually described as coming from skulls. 

Zagreus wouldn't have minded a skull to stare into right about now. 

"You are different from the other Olympians," said Chaos, and they moved closer to Zagreus. He wasn't entirely sure _how_ they were moving, since they didn't seem to have any legs, but they were still... moving. 

"I didn't exactly grow up amongst them," said Zagreus, and he gave a nervous little laugh. He wasn't sure what it was that had him so on edge. He was still in pain, still throbbing and sore in places he wasn't sure he had a name for. There was an aching desperation building in the pit of his stomach, and he wasn't sure what it was or where it came from.

Could it have been Chaos? 

"I can grant you more boons," Chaos said, and they were now close enough to Zagreus that the mist that shrouded parts of Chaos's body was beginning to flow over Zagreus. "I can give you many gifts, if you accept."

"Will there be a price?" Zagreus licked his lips. He was closer to Chaos than he had ever been. His nerves were telling him contradictory things; that Chaos's skin was so cold it burned, that Chaos was dangerous and he needed to get away while also being as close to a home as Zagreus would ever get. 

“There is always a price,” said Chaos, in that echoing voice of theirs. 

"Well, yes, there's always a price, but there's a price and there's a _price_ , said Zagreus. "If you follow."

Chaos kept staring that deep, unblinking stare of theirs that left Zagreus feeling... odd. He wasn't sure what it was, exactly, that he found so compelling about Chaos. Maybe it was the kind indifference in their eyes? Was kind indifference a thing? 

His head was spinning. Being in this realm always left him disorientated, light headed. His thoughts seemed to go in new directions, and those directions seemed to be changing the very shape of his mind in and of itself. It was all so... old, so unrelated to him in its own way. Walking through Tartarus, he was in his Father's realm. He'd never been to any place that _wasn't_ his Father's, but deep in the Earth... that was older than him.

Older than anything.

There was something almost sad in Chaos's face, and then their hand was coming up, to cup Zagreus's cheek. The touch of their skin was like ice, so cold that it burned, and it made Zagreus shudder all over, his skin breaking out in goosebumps, all his hair standing on end. 

"Your way will not be easy, little godling," they said. 

"If I've learned anything from all of my travels," Zagreus said, "it's that nothing ever is." 

"You've barely traveled," Chaos corrected. Their fingers were moving across his cheek, and then they were buried in his hair, forcing his head back. The tender skin of his scalp was screaming from the intensity of the cold, but there was an almost calming effect to the pain. He hadn't realized calmness could come from pain. 

"You could show me things," said Zagreus. "You could take me out."

"I cannot," said Chaos. "The course is set." There was a finality to their words that made something in Zagreus's stomach twist up in ways that weren't entirely pleasant. 

"But... you're Chaos!" Zagreous rested a hand on Chaos's chest, beside the pulsing jewel embedded in their sternum. The coldness of their skin was a shock, and so was the way it riled under his palm. It was like holding on to a tempest, the way he'd heard Poseidon brag about in the past. "Chaos is change. Chaos is... bringing new things about, yes?"

"I see the course," said Chaos, and their hand pressed Zagreus's into their chest. There was an odd give to the skin, and Zagreus had the terrifying image of his arm melding in to Chaos's chest, of his whole body melding in to join Chaos. There was an odd comfort to the danger, an odd comfort to knowing that in its own way, this was just as dangerous as the wretches or the Furies. Everything in the House of Hades was too _safe_ , and being in danger brought some type of life back to Zagreus. 

He stood on his tiptoes, and he kissed Chaos. The pain of it was enough to make him cry out, but he didn't stop the kiss. He let his tongue slide between Chaos's lips, and then Chaos was pulling back, and looking at him with that same hard to read expression. As if Chaos had any other kind of expression.

"I will ask you for a greater boon," Zagreus said, slowly and carefully. "Anything you'd wish for, that is in my power, I will do."

"You do not go around making promises like that, little godling," Chaos said, and their tone was almost sad. "I will take from you what you offer, but in the future, do not offer it quite so easily." 

"I will offer what I see fit to offer," Zagreus insisted, and his lips were tingling. 

Chaos yanked his head back by the hair, and it was another jolt of pain shooting through Zagreus shaking. He was getting hard, and that was unexpected - he'd gotten hard in the heat of battle in the past, but he'd always assumed it was simply the exhilaration of the fight. Not the pain. He wanted to chase this feeling - wanted to chase _any_ new feeling.

Maybe that was why he kept trying to get out, kept trying to pursue new things. The eternal _sameness_ of the House of Hades was beginning to eat at his soul, beginning to smother him like a fire under water. He would rather die again and again, would rather become one with this ancient primordial being then have to spend another day in his father's house, doing the same things again and again, eternally. 

"You are young," Chaos said, and their echoing voice seemed to fill the whole world. They _were_ the whole world, as they held him to their chest. The mist seemed to be flowing over him like water now, like the blood that he clawed his way out of every time he died and came slinking back to his father's house. "You are young, and you do not yet know the way of the world."

"The world can be changed," Zagreus murmured, as lips trailed down his neck, and hands moved across his body. Chaos's mouth was moving all along his whole body, and Chaos had too many hands. 

Then again, it was Chaos had _ways_ , ways that he'd never thought about, except now he seemed to be drowning in them. The pain and the pleasure and the sensations that he didn't yet have names yet seemed to all be mingling in his head. He remembered seeing Styx spinning thread, joining it all together to form one solid thread, and that spinning seemed to be pulling tighter and tighter in his guts. One set of fingers were raking sharp nails down his side, another was cradling his cheek. Chaos's mouth was soft against his neck, and Chaos's teeth were sharp against his shoulder.

Zagreus was making embarrassing noises - the kinds of embarrassing noises that he usually muffled with his hands, except for the fact that his hands were being held by Chaos, and his head was spinning. Was breathing in the mist of Chaos doing strange things to him? 

"Things have to follow their course," said Chaos, and their voice was echoing through Zagreus's head, as their hands moved under his clothes. "You are playing your part, as we all are." There were sharp nails digging into his side, fingers pinching his nipples.

When had pain become this... exciting? Zagreus squirmed, panted, throwing his head back. He was surrounded by Chaos, engulfed like a fly in amber. He couldn't really move, as he was held, and the being held was terrifying in its tenderness.

"I created the whole world," Chaos said, and their deep, echoing voice was enough to make his head spin. His nipples were being twisted harder now, and he arched his back, letting his eyes squeeze shut. He could even smell Chaos, the scent of some kind of maddening incense and the deep, cold scent of the realm. 

"You started the world," Zagreus corrected, because he wouldn't be himself if he wasn't at least trying to keep up. Unless it was a bad idea to antagonize Chaos in a situation like this. 

Maybe he was overthinking it. 

Chaos made an amused noise, and another set of hands were on Zagreus's thighs, squeezing them, then forcing him upright. The hands squeezed, hard enough that it sent white hot bolts of pain through Zagreus, and he thrashed and moaned, his mouth falling open. 

"Little godling," Chaos said, "the world would have started regardless." Another hand, this one squeezing Zagreus's cock. 

_Is this the right time to be having this conversation?_ Zagreus thought, and he tried not to thrash, as he was bitten again, and then he was moaning, his hips rocking forward. The hand stroking his cock was cold and hot at the same time, the same mass of contradictions that Chaos always presented.

"Your hands," Zagreus said instead, and he let gasped, as his balls were squeezed, tugged. He couldn't see Chaos's face, and that was probabyl for the best. Chaos could drive anyone to madness, he'd heard all of the stories. Would madness be so bad, after... all of this? Would going mad pull him out of this endless cycle of dying and coming back and dying again?

The sensation of all of those hands touching him, all of those mouths. Everything seemed to be happening at once, and he was unsettled. Chaos was dangerous - he knew that in his bones, the same way he knew that he had to get away from his father - and _yet_.

"I have many," Chaos agreed. There were fingers being shoved into Zagreus's mouth now, and he sucked on them, tried not to gag. His nerves seemed to be firing off at random, and each time Chaos stroked his cock, it felt as if someone was also lashing his back with a scourge, which made no sense. Why would that be pleasurable in the first place? Zagreus had been whipped in the past, and it hadn't been a thing he had enjoyed at the time.

Somehow, this was... if not enjoyable, it was making him feel so many things, all at once. Things that were making his head spin and his chest heave, things that were leaving him weak and trembling and full of the kind of desperation that made him think of some kind of madness. 

Zagreus let his legs be forced further apart, and there was... something around his cock, something wet and hot and cold, something that seemed to contradict all of the rules of reality, but _didn't_.

"I am in all things," rumbled Chaos's great voice, and it was echoing through Zagreus's chest, echoing down Zagreus's nerves, filling his whole body. A set of claws were digging down his chest and his sides, under his clothes, and it was activating all of the sweet pleasure centers inside. His cock was being stroked, and there was something around his neck, squeezing. 

"You could kill me," Zagreus said, and he wasn't sure why he said it, as the thing around his cock squeezed and tugged, making his toes curl. "You could... you could kill me, here and now, and I'd still come back." Why was this falling out of his mouth? It was as if the pain was freeing something in him, something that didn't seem to want to shut up. "Chaos, you... you are older than anything, you know things that I can never hope to discover, you could kill me and I would thank you for it..."

There was a hand on his face now, big fingers sliding between his lips. Zagreus sucked on them, his eyes sliding shut, and he let himself drown in the sensations. It was so much _more_ than he’d ever experience.He was breathing in Chaos's mist, as they prodded at his hole with... who even knew what it was. He was being pressed down now, on all fours, his ass in the air. The thing that had been pushing at his hole was thick, and had that same contradictory mix of sensations of everything else. It was wet, and it slid into him without much resistance. 

It wasn't the first time that Zagreus had something inside of him, wasn't the first time he'd been fucked like this. The big body draped over him seemed to be bigger than anything he'd ever experienced - Chaos was surprisingly heavy, and the constant shifting under their skin was enough to give Zagreus the creeps. There were so many shifting, complicated sensations that he didn't know what to concentrate on. 

Zagreus ground his hips back into the thing that was filling him, and he let his eyes slide shut. There was another sharp pain blooming on his shoulder, like a supernova. He whined in the back of his throat, and there was another bite. It was painful enough that his cock was twitching, and that didn't make sense. He bit the fingers in his mouth (if they were fingers?) and he tasted something sharp and bright, puddling on his tongue and drooling down his chin.

"I know your fear, little godling," said Chaos, as the thing inside of him began to move. "I know what you want more than anything else. You strive like every thing that lives, mortal and divine. Your wanting could eclipse the world, if you let it." 

More nails digging into his side, more thrusting into him, and then… pleasure. Pleasure yanked out of him like a recalcitrant tooth, and he almost _resented_ it, as his orgasm wracked through him and left him limp and panting, cradled in Chaos’s arms. The pleasure seemed to pulse, and each little bit of pleasure had a touch of pain, until the two sensations continued to twist up, and he clenched the intrusion inside of him like he was gripping it in his fist. 

“Your path will be difficult,” Hades said, their voice echoing through him, “and yet…” They didn’t say anything else, but their mist slowly faded away, their form slowly faded away, until it was just Zagreus lying there, his own come wet and sticky against his belly. He couldn’t stop shaking, but he felt… everything.

With a sigh, Zagreus stood up, picking his weapon back up. This had been a temporary reprieve. He needed to keep going. 

He just needed to keep going.


End file.
